Is That All You Got?

Who gives a shit?

Even if Kevin Durant couldn’t bench press Paris Hilton’s skinny ass, he can still ball! Have people already forgotten the freshman phenom swept every player of the year award? Have they already forgotten he’s a 6’10” Gumby with a 7’5” wingspan who can handle the ball like Kobe?

But wait a minute; he can’t even bench press 185 pounds!

Who gives a shit! When was the last time Michael Jordan bench-pressed a game winning shot?

This is the same kind of heresy the media mumbled a year ago when another Texas superstar was entering the draft. A hoopla of skepticism erupted when it was discovered that Vince Young did poorly on the weurlick test. Cynics claimed Vince wouldn’t amount to anything in the pros. And they were right. If winning rookie of the year and making the Pro Bowl are signs of failure.

So here they are again. The skeptics have slithered out from underneath their pessimistic rocks to talk more shit. If stating that Kevin Durant can’t even bench press 185 pounds is the only thing the doubters can come up with, then I’m so “unimpressed” that I want to draft him #1.

These schmucks who probably get their sense of journalism from watching Fox News, have no idea what they’re talking about. Of course Kevin Durant can’t lift weights like roid-popping Mr. Universe. He’s 18!

Durant’s idea of a workout program is flirting with girls and updating his myspace page. Strength training is something that will be instilled by professional coaches at the next level. So don’t worry about how much Durant can bench press. Just worry about how many three-pointers he’s going to drop in your eye. Because like fellow Longhorn stud Vince Young, Kevin Durant not only has extraterrestrial talent, he’s got the intangibles.

It’s like Rudy T. once said, “Never underestimate the heart of a champion!”